Season 4 of the The Hills premieres tonight, and to further accentuate the continued decline of civilization, Heidi Montag has released a new single “Overdosin’” which sounds exactly like her previous single “Fashion”. I’m pretty sure Heidi Montag is just sitting in a recording booth saying words. No, scratch that. I don’t want to give this thing more credit than it’s due. Anyway, Heidi explained the meaning of her latest abortion to Ryan Seacrest this morning:

“‘Overdosin” is about “when you fall in love with someone… and [you’re] just overdosing off of their love.”

Now, if only Heidi and Spencer would overdose off each other’s love - or heroin. I’m cool either way. Audio after the jump.

Via [Thesuperficial]

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Dita Von Teese shows off her new line of lingerie that she designed for Wonderbra. It’s meant to be worn all day under your normal clothes because apparently Dita wants all you ladies to be slutty superheroes. Finally, a cause I have the ability to support! In the meantime, here are the details from Marie Claire UK:

‘I love it when you can go about your daily business with the knowledge that you’ve a tiny secret of your own on underneath. Lingerie shouldn’t be something you just put on for your lover; you should do it for you. It’s not about seducing men, it’s about embracing womanhood.’

Of course, what superior way to embrace womanhood than by seducing men. Just sayin’.

Via [Thesuperficial]

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A surprisingly immune to overdose Amy Winehouse went on her daily drinking binge last night and in the process managed to assault an innocent bystander. Apparently an older woman was concerned for Amy’s health and stopped to talk to her. Fearing that her drugs might be in danger, Amy’s survival instincts kicked in, according to The Sun:

Amy lashed out at the middle-aged woman – giving her a hard slap and screaming: “Let f***ing go of me, d***head.”
As she walked away, Amy carried on shouting at her victim, calling her a “f***ing bitch”.

Amy then swiftly scaled a fire escape where she attempted to breast feed a bag of crack. British authorities are calling it “the most heinous act of terror since that time Amy peed on a fire hydrant.” Thanks to Helena who reminds everyone that Amy Winehouse won’t enter your home unless you invite her in. Also, she can’t cross bodies of water so, HA, England! In your face!

Via [Thesuperficial]

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These are shots of bikini models at the Hotel Bondi 08/09 Swim Show taking place in Sydney, Australia. What’s this got to do with anything? Bikini. Do I even know any of these girls’ names? Not even one. Are they of age? Uhhh, sure! Do I deserve a Pulitzer for this? Yes, all of them. How slow of a news day is it? It was either these or more “Katie Holmes is pregnant” speculation. Damn, I chose wisely! I know.

Via [Thesuperficial]

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Olympic athlete and women’s volleyball competitor Kerri Walsh has wisely decided her ass is a veritable weapon in the fight against HIV/AIDS infection. I want everyone to know I’m “behind” this cause. Hi-OH! But, no, seriously, if I make a donation do I at least get to touch the butt and/or bounce a quarter off it? What if I just sort of run past it and graze it with my hand? I’m willing to post date as many checks as it takes to get this thing done. You know, because I care deeply about whatever it is your cause was again. Sea lions?

Via [Thesuperficial]

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These are bikini photos of British model and Television personality Liz Fuller. I’m also convinced Liz is secretly a Transfomer. One minute she’s a decent looking model, but then the next she looks like your best friend’s middle-aged mom who you really wish would put some clothes on because, seriously, it was a one time thing, Mrs. Geekologie. Who am I kidding? I can’t quit you!

Via [Thesuperficial]

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Lindsay Lohan slapped on her blogging bra to discuss allegations that her 14-year-old sister Ali has breast implants. In the lengthy diatribe on her MySpace page, Lindsay also surprisingly defends her mom Dina who has the parenting skills of asbestos:

hey everyone..
i just had to share something that came up today and it made me feel a bit sick to my stomach.
so, here’s the visual…
me and my friend Patrick walking into a store, and two paparazzi come up out of nowhere (like usual) and begin throwing questions at me…
one of them being, “Hey Lindsay, what do you’ve to say about people commenting on your sisters implants?”
WOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
my response simply was, “Did you really just ask me that? She is a 14 year old girl, and you are a pedophile!”
i was caught out of nowhere so i didn’t really come up with the proper response at the time.. there’s many other things that i felt like saying, but why give it to a random guy with a camera so that he can make money!
All i am trying to state is, is that, i was raised with a wonderful family surrounding me, of course we’ve our ups and downs, but all in all my mom taught us to appreciate what we’ve been given. Nor would she ever encourage, or allow a 14 year old child to modify her body.
i am not judging people that do, but i am just saying that its not something that my family finds necessary to do, especially when you’re not even fully developed yet!
It is hard enough being 14 years old and you’ve enough insecurities to start with, then add being in the public eye…
i just find it really disconcerting that people have to focus on the negative and that some people are sooooo bored with their own lives that they need to manifest lies to injured another person.
in a more positive light…
i got some great clothes from alexander wang and i miss samantha cuz she’s out of town
have a wonderful day everyone~
til next time..
xx LL

“Til next time”? Christ, there’s going to be more?! Excuse me for a second. I suddenly feel the overwhelming urge to fire a bullet into my face. BRB!

Via [Thesuperficial]

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Hold on to your androgynous zones; the new season of America’s Next Top Model just got a whole lot more penis-ier. Meet Isis (above) a transgender model who “identifies herself as ‘a woman born physically male.’” She/He made the cut to be on Tyra Bank’s absolutely scripted modeling competition and looks forward to pretending to have to a chance on this season’s cycle, according to Us Weekly:

Will she be a role model?
“I like to help people, but I’m here to follow my dreams,” she tells Us. The inclusion of Isis is being hailed by GLAAD president Neil Giuliano as “an unprecedented opportunity for a community that’s underrepresented on TV.
“We applaud Tyra Banks and The CW for making this historic visibility of transgender people possible,” Giuliano stated.

So, if she’s a woman born physically male, does that mean she makes herself her own sandwiches? Otherwise, you lost me.

Via [Thesuperficial]

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Madonna and Guy Ritchie were reportedly set to “adopt” an African girl named Mercy before their marriage hit the rocks. Now that the healing has begun, the couple is moving forward with the adoption plans that don’t sound anything at all like an international incident waiting to explode. Except for, oh I dunno, the part where the child’s grandmother doesn’t want to relinquish custody but is being forced to by Madonna’s adoption agency who I’m willing to bet is Blackwater. The Sun reports:

The friend stated Madge “fell in love” with Mercy when they met at her orphanage last year. However, the girl’s gran Lucy Chekechiwa, 60, stated she has been asked repeatedly by officials if Mercy could be adopted by an “unidentified foreign family” — but was firmly against it.
Speaking from her village in Zomba District, Lucy said: “We know that it is Mercy who Madonna really wants. We heard it is because my granddaughter is such a beautiful, happy child. Twice I have told the adoption people that I don’t want Mercy to go outside the country. But they keep on at us. Now they state that Mercy will be leaving us, but can return at age 18. Yet I might not be alive then.”

I feel sorry for Madonna’s publicist Liz Rosenberg. She’s working her ass off to make it look like her client’s not an undead creature of the night, but then you get stories from the heart of Africa about Madonna sweeping into villages and stealing kids. She’s going to have to bang someone way more famous than A-Rod to make this one go away. I’m talking, at the very least, Jesus and/or Batman.

Via [Thesuperficial]

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Samantha Ronson is speaks about her “relationship” with Lindsay Lohan in the pages of the new Harper’s Bazaar. Because you know who cares about lesbians? Housewives. That’s science:

When asked about Lohan, Samantha is polite but firm. “I’m not going to speak about Lindsay because she’s my friend, you know? She’s great. She’s also 22 years old. I think people forget that. With the World wide web the way it is, one second we’re enemies, one second we’re best friends, one second we’re lovers, and then we’re broken up.”
By press time, reports had trickled out on the Web that Samantha had changed her personal status on Facebook to “in a relationship,” while pics of her and Lohan holding hands had circulated. She’s accustomed to the speculation. “Even the airport-security guy in Canada asked me, ‘So, is it true?’” laughs Samantha. “It’s like, ‘Oh, yeah, I’m telling you.’”

So, reading between the lines, I’ve finally concluded this whole lesbian engagement thing is an orchestrated effort to revive Lindsay’s career. But who is she really having sex with, and where are they hiding the bodies? (You can’t speak if you’re dead.) I mean, sure, Lindsay could be sleeping with just one guy who’s on the payroll, but that would constitute monogamy which is a fancy word for “crazy speak.”

Via [Thesuperficial]

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